Emotional intelligence is important, but the unbridled enthusiasm has obscured a dark side. New evidence shows that when people hone their emotional skills, they become better at manipulating others. When you’re good at controlling your own emotions, you can disguise your true feelings. When you know what others are feeling, you can tug at their heartstrings and motivate them to act against their own best interests.
I’m an advocate for emotional intelligence. I think emotional intelligence boils down to, don’t trust your emotions, they can betray you. Learning to recognize when you’re having an emotional response is important. When you do, you’ll be able to manage your own emotions and your responses to them.
Of course, having this ability also means, if you’re unscrupulous, that you’ll be able to manipulate people who aren’t very emotionally intelligent. Like any tool or skill, it can be used for immoral purposes.
The solution, it seems to me, isn’t to think of emotional intelligence as a bad thing. (And to be fair, the linked article doesn’t say that.) It’s to regard it as something every adult should strive to learn, just as they should strive to learn money management and other basics of 21st century life.
- How Emotionally Intelligent Are You? (larahentz.wordpress.com)
- How Emotionally Intelligent Are You? Here’s How To Tell (jtm71.wordpress.com)
- The biggest predictor of career success? Not skills or education – but emotional intelligence (business.financialpost.com)
- Emotional Intelligence Predicts Job Success: Do You Have It? (fastcompany.com)
- Emotional Intelligence at workplace…!!! (hrabhishek.wordpress.com)
- Manipulative and empathetic people both adept at reading emotions (thealmagest.com)
- Mapping How Emotions Manifest in the Body – Olga Khazan – The Atlantic (theatlantic.com)
- Do You Have the Emotional Quotient to Pick up Positive vibes? (balroop2013.wordpress.com)